Maine Mom Wonders What Would Happen Today to Tomboy Daughter: Letter

The following is a letter to the editor:

During my 33 years specializing in Pediatric care my first motto was first and foremost do no harm. I loved my job but being a parent and protecting my children was always my first priority. So here is my story. From the time my daughter was age 2 years old she would tell people when asked that she was a boy. My co worker always said she should have been born a boy. She grew up very much a tom boy. Perhaps that was because she had been rejected by her dad. At age 12 he came back into her life for 6 months and then vanished again. She was devastated and became angry and moody and needed counseling for 6 months. By age 14 she was dressing in boy’s clothes and told me she was gay

In 8th grade, 1993 she joined the boys football team as their first and only female player, playing offensive tackle and she was good. She continued to pay football in 9th through 11th grade. When the football coach wanted to advance her from the JV team to the varsity team, she came to me and asked me to write her a note and tell the coach that I no longer wanted her to play on the team. She was smart enough to realize she could be seriously hurt if she continued to play. She was 5 ft 10 inches and weighed 180 but now the boys she was going up against were 6 ft+ and 230+ lbs.

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She went off to college and was recruited to play on the women’s rugby team where she excelled and fit right in with like minded females. By the time she was in her in early 20’s she had adjusted and accepted her status as female, who still preferred to dress in masculine attire but was happy and well adjusted. She went on to play in three US Women’s World Cup events and two years ago was inducted into the US Rugby Hall of Fame. She and her partner of 15 years have two beautiful daughters and my daughter breast fed both of the girls for over a year.

Now let’s suppose my daughter was growing up at this time. My parental rights might be taken away because I refused to let them label her with gender dysphoria and call her he. She could be put on hormones that would change her whole life and those changes are not reversible. By 15 she could have had her body mutilated by a radical mastectomy. What would that have done to her, no children, no ability to breast feed her babies, no rugby career and no recognition as one of the premiere woman’s rugby players in North America. Most important, no time to grow into her body and time to accept and celebrate her woman hood.

Abigale Shrier’s book, “Irreversible Damage” discusses the epidemic of teenage girls rushing to use hormones and surgery. All influenced by what is called social contagion. Doctors and peers are pressuring young people to use hormones and surgery, prescribing it as gender affirming care that requires a lifetime of medical care. Many of these children have poor coping skills, emotional and mental health issues and they fall prey to social pressures and want to copy others. They identify and are encouraged to identify their discomfort and confusion as gender dysphoria. It is a way to get more attention and feel more popular.
As they get older, many realize that the hormones and surgeries have not made them feel better. By age 23, 80 to 85% of teens who identified as trans by 3 years out no longer identify as such. First and foremost, Do NO Harm. For no matter what a person tries to do on the outside there are trillions of cells in each person’s body declaring the truth loudly, XY male, XX female.

Sharyn Cookson, Capt. USN Retired
Camden, ME